Why You Can't Take Me Anywhere!

So, I’m at my book club meeting. Discussion begins in the living room after we’ve all enjoyed a sampling of wonderful food. A couple of us head to the dessert table near the sofa. I linger trying to make the best decision considering I’ve already splurged with two pieces of bread.

I quietly eye the choices. Hmmm, what’s this over here in the corner? I love those little candies, Boston Baked Beans. Maybe I’ll just scoop up a few. Wonder why there isn’t a spoon to dish them out? Oh, well, I’ll be very careful to not contaminate the ones I don’t take.

ACK! POO! SPIT! UGH!!!! What the hell is this?!?!? I say, hand to mouth, trying to run discreetly to the kitchen for the garbage can. And then my taste buds sound the alarm. Oh, my god, it’s… potpourri!!!!!!!!!!

I’ll understand if the members need to discuss whether or not I’m still allowed in the club!

--Diana
www.DianaBlack.net

Women Only Over Fifty available through Amazon and Echelon Press!

Buy the new WOOF companion

Accentuate The Pawsitive!

Take WHY? for an answer?

So tell me, do you get upset when someone answers your question with a question?

What do I mean? you ask.

See, right there! So was that second question asked because clarification is warranted? Or rather to ignore the first question?

The first question asked for a simple yes or no response. Or at least a declarative sentence!

Well, I guess if you've read this far, it's no secret how I feel about questions answered with questions.

But then, I just asked myself, do I do that?

The answer came at lightning speed.

Why, would it upset me if I did?

-- Diana "WhY me?" Black

www.DianaBlack.net

Why Follow This Blog Tour?

Cuz you might could get some FREE stuff!

As two WOOFers (Women Only Over Fifty), Mary Cunningham and I are on a blog tour for the next couple of weeks. We're celebrating the release of "Accentuate The Pawsitive," a guide to realigning your body, mind and soul.

"Mind spinning? Mood Swinging? Middle sagging? Get used to it! When you reach 50, shift happens. But, you're not alone. WOOFers to the rescue!"

Follow us on tour, make a comment on the various blog stops to enter a contest for a free download of "Accentuate The Pawsitive!"
DEC 24 - Dames of Dialogue Interview - Woofers who Accentuate the Pawsitive

DEC 30 - Dames of Dialogue Interview - WOOFer, Mary answers the Dames Dozen

JAN 4 - Doing It With Grace Blog - Chocolate - 'Nuff Said!

JAN 5 - A Woman's Life In Stages - Downward Facing Dog

JAN 6 - Mysteries & Chitchat - Fashion Fits or Flops

JAN 8 - The Stiletto Gang - Boning Up On Books

JAN 11 - Blog: A Working Writer - Animal Rescue: Mission For Mutts

JAN 12 - Virtual Wordsmith - Myths About Menopaws

Jan 13 - Blog Talk Radio - Mary Eileen Williams, Feisty Side of Fifty

Join us! and find out how to get your copy of "Accentuate The Pawsitive!"

Like to laugh? You'll discover more funny women stories,

limericks and poems when you...
BUY WOOF!

Echelon Press

The DaY After Christmas!

The Day After Christmas
(Black/Sager/del Verle)


On the 26th I’ll surprise them all
This year I won’t go to the mall
Instead I’ll build a man of snow
Hug and kiss under mistletoe
Then I’ll call old friends
That I haven’t seen
Since I can’t remember when
And I won’t worry about a thing
I’ll just keep on caroling
And make the day after Christmas
The best day of the year
And the day after that even better
No matter what season it may be
Christmas cheer will follow me
Day after day after day after day after Christmas
I'll make cookies for the whole neighborhood
Because I want to, not cause I should
See angel's wings in silver-gray
In every tree that's along my way
And I’ll be just like good old Santa Claus
Listen close when children talk
I’ll give and give till my heart is full
And rejoice in miracles
And make the day after Christmas
The best day of the year
And the day after that even better
No matter what season it may be
Christmas cheer will follow me
Day after day after day after day after Christmas

-- Diana Black

Happy HolidaY!

Hope you enjoy this holiday song written by Joyce Trammell and yours truly several years ago. Tim Buppert singing... All the best to your and yours this holiday season!

Why I Love Julia Child

We cracked up when Aykroyd declared, "Save the liver!"

We beamed when Streep cheered, "Bon appétit!"

But to understand why this Julia Child fan wrote a poem,

check out

www.WoofersClub.blogspot.com

Why I'm Squirrely!

This picture was taken at our home in Tennessee a few years back before moving to Georgia. I always thought this squirrel was teasing Charlie, maybe saying, "I got yer nuts right here!"

Now I'm thinking he heard about the move and was getting the address for our Georgia residence.

And maybe it took him three years to catch up with us. Heck, who knows how fast a squirrel travels across state lines. Anyhoo, either he or some of his kin have been living above us. In our attic, feasting on electrical wires. Without getting zapped. I haven't figured out if that last piece is a good thing or a bad thing.

So beware, my friends, of squirrels tiptoeing on your rafters...Cuz it'll drive ya squirrely!